Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Oh #!*T

I feel like a truck hit me and backed up and hit me again. We only spent a day in Lake George. Not because I wasn't feeling well, but because the kids were bored which I was happy of. On the ride home it really hit me. By the time we got home all I could do is lay down in the dark. This morning I ended up in my primary care's office. Both of my rheumatologist went of vacation at the same time! I ended up getting a shot for the headache. Never heard of that before. It helped me sleep and it lessened the headache a little. I so wiped out. I surprised I can even get on the computer. My advice to lupus travelers. STAY OUT OF THE SUN! There's no other way around it for me anyway. I'm going to go lay back down. I got some cool  pics though. I'll post them at a later date.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Day 3 and 4

I really enjoyed visiting with family. Madison is beautiful. Two year olds can be such a delight. They are much better as grandchildren! I spent all of yesterday on the road. Not fun. Trying to keep my feeling sick from the family. I screwed up on my meds and didn't pick up on it until Monday. Taking 5mg of prednisone instead of 7mg. Last minute pick up of 1 mg pills that I tossed in my pocketbook. I prefill a pill box so I don't know how many days I went without noticing. It couldn't have been more than 3. Needless to say the 11 hr drive to Lake George from VA was an achy affair. We switched hotels when we got here. Just a long journey. Not sure if I have recouped but we're off to see the sights this morning. This was definitely too much for one trip. I'll be happy to sit at home for a few weeks!
Finally got a good cup of coffee! Good old New England!

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Day 2

The wedding was beautiful. I had such a nice time. I did realize something. I am now part of the older group that kind of sits off to the side while the younger ones are having all the fun on the dance floor. Maybe that's when the bride and groom are in the early twenties. Anyway it was fun to watch. And I didn't feel out of place for not dancing ( aches and pains still in foot -wore a cute pair of wedges lol) because no one else my age was dancing either. Regardless, had a fabulous time with family. Now I have to get the guys up, so we can begin our next journey. Off to see Maddie! I'll add pics when I get home. If I remember!;-)
Live.Love.Laugh. Enjoy!

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Having Fun

Did I say it was hot in CT? OMG! It's hot down here! SC in June is no joke. I had to go back in the hotel until around 6pm. The car thermometer was registering 101 degrees outside! All the sunscreen and hats in the world weren't going to help me at that point. Luckily the hotel is lovely and the kids are getting along. It's so peaceful and that's fun for me. Caught up on much needed sleep. Just feeling like there's nothing I need to do is a vacation. I'll keep you posted. I have the wedding today, my grandbaby in NC and family in VA tomorrow! Then we're off to two days in Lake George!
Live.Love.Laugh. Enjoy!

Monday, June 21, 2010

It's hot!

For those in Connecticut, I've just stated the obvious.  I can't take it. My foot hurts so I can't get in the pool. Tried it. Can't maneuver the ladder. Any exposure to the sun is draining. Going on vacation in a few days.  It's going to be fabulous. If I say it enough it will happen. My meat eating is at it's end. Did I mention I went back to meat? Two nights ago was the most painful night I've had in a while. Every joint hurt and there was this weird pain in my upper abdomen. Indigestion maybe?! I don't know, but i didn't like it. I don't know why I stop doing things that work for me. This is day two. I slept better last night. Still a bit achy. Had an x-ray done on the foot - found nothing. We knew that going in. The docs did mention possible surgery on a nerve in the foot. I guess I'll go see an orthopedic doc when I get back. Not thrilled. More money, more docs to tell you we don't know what is wrong. Oh and I have the typical protein in the urine - so repeat the test. I don't think I've had a lab where everything was perfect in over two years, but stilll they find nothing. Nothing can be good. I'm grateful. Let's be clear on that. I've learned to like nothing. Look how far I've gotten away from it's hot. lol
I miss coming up here. Hopefully it won't be too long next time

Tuesday, June 8, 2010


Things are going well with me and my son. We've reached an understanding. The friends I don't like aren't welcomed in my house or in my car. I've been keeping him busy doing fun and organized things, so he hasn't wanted to hang out with those friends - yet.
Went to the gyn yesterday. Every things is well except my blood pressure. It was higher than it's ever been - 150/99. I'm going to have to stop playing around and lose weight. I don't want to go on any more medications if it can be prevented. I also have to reduce the stress which I have just started to do, so that should help.
I'm going to get ready to go for my walk. I haven't done it in awhile, so I need to get back out there.

Thursday, June 3, 2010


Kids. Need I say more. My latest battle. Friends. On going battle through the years. You can't choose your children's friends. I try to protect them. Let them know that friendship is a mutual respect. I respect my friends differences, I respect their property, I respect them. And it's mutual. I like to keep my friendships balanced. I don't want to feel like I'm giving more to the relationship and I don't want my friend to feel they are giving more. I can't afford to put a lot of energy and effort in any relationship and not get anything back. I have ended many relationships for that reason, whether it be friend or family. Having lupus has taught me a lot about friends and what really being a friend is about for me. I think that's where I'm getting stuck with my kids. I want their values for friendship to be the same as mine. Am I wrong? Do I sit back and watch them get walked all over because they want friends and to me are sacrificing their ( I can't find the right word) is it integrity for the sake of having friends? Demonstrating behavior not becoming to them or their household just to be liked. I went through that. It's not fun. It doesn't feel well. At least it didn't to me. I use to think my kids were an extension of me. I don't anymore. I had another heated discussion with my youngest and I told him I was beyond angry with the situation. What's beyond angry? For me, indifference. I'm shutting myself off from it. I can't spend anymore energy on it. It's like a brick wall and getting me nowhere. I'm turning it over to my husband. Fortunately for me and him there is another parent in the home to turn it over too. I'm losing sleep. My body aches. My head is exploding. I have to close off. It hurts. I've shed my tears and I know I have more, but there's nothing more I can do. Wish me luck.